Got Kids? Help Them Learn to Self-Regulate!

I feel like an old lady about to go on a rant about the way it used to be. You know the tone of that voice that screeches, " When I was a kid..kids used to fall down and pick themselves up." "When I was a kid, you ate what you didn't like, and you pretended you liked it!" "When I was a kid..." Ok, ok, I will stop now since I am sure you get the point. So, what is my point exactly? I've been thinking a lot lately about some essential skills kids need to survive, and, more importantly, thrive in kindergarten. No, I don't mean those academic ones, like writing your name, or knowing your letters or even counting to 10. I am thinking more of the ability to get through the day with a smile on your face, not all the time, but at least most of the time.
You see, many kids cannot seem to flow smoothly through the day, handling the moments when life doesn't serve them up their dreams on a silver platter. When asked to do something that is a bit challenging, or something they don't instantaneously love,  they simply don't "want to" and feel free to shout it from the rooftops. What is happening to us, adults? Have we lost our way? We have indulged, cajoled, entertained and pleaded with kids to get them to do what we want them to do. We have read books about how to turn their little worlds into places where they don't suffer any disappointment, pain or self-doubt. All this, perhaps, in an effort to protect their self-esteem, which might have been eroded for us in our own childhoods. Did our parents shelter us from the pain of disappointment? Mine surely didn't! And trust me, I have my own childhood skeletons so I am not claiming to be the world's foremost parenting expert. I definitely worked very hard with my own kids to "do  parenting" much different than my parents did. I listened to my kids, but I didn't rescue them. ( or at least I tried not to rescue) I empathized when they cried because they didn't get their way, but did I back down and change my mind, no! At least most of the time I tried to be consistent. Was it easy? No!
Here's what happens when kids come to kindergarten, and  you can see why they need the skills to manage their moods and attention.
It's 8:00 a.m. and the students in Room 11 have been busy greeting each other and putting their belongings away. In the next five minutes a couple of  kids will stroll in late, one of them I will call B.( not his real initial) B is late 9 times out of 10, often because he has delayed the day at home by refusing to eat his breakfast, get dressed or be ready on time.  He tries nearly every day to stash toys in his pockets which often become larger than life distractions for him. His parents are wonderful, loving parents who both work full-time. ( I have no bias here, trust me, I worked when my kids were little.. I have always worked!) Usually he walks in fresh with a smile on his face, which remains there until the first encounter when I have to redirect this highly energetic little guy to stay on task. His dad helps him get started on his work, and within 3 minutes,  B. is up and around the classroom, socializing and doing, well, frankly whatever he wants to do. He is over at another table group visiting with another boy who would rather suck on his water bottle, shirt sleeve, or anything else he can find rather than get started working. There is a reason that these 2 boys are across the classroom from each other, yet at any opportunity they are like magnets, stuck to each other engaged in a love-hate relationship where at least once a day one of them is in tears or in a huff about something the other one said.   With a quick glance over as I take roll, I request for B. to go back to his desk and complete his work, a math page that is usually a fun review with a dot to dot or simple graph of a concept we have been learning.  Do the kids think it's fun? Well, most of them somehow do, but B? Not so much. He doesn't really like many tasks that involve a pencil and an attention span of longer than a couple minutes. I get that! Truly I do, but we have many other moments during the day when kids get to learn without pencils.
Fast forward to 8:10 ( wait, that's only 7 minutes later and already there's an issue?) It's time to line up for morning songs and exercises and B. is goofing around in line, clowning and trying to get his pals to respond to his antics. Ok, yes, having fun is allowed at school. I encourage a good sense of humor and give kids many opportunities to shine through their delight in telling stories, jokes, etc.  On the other hand, when you have a kid who derives most of his satisfaction from taking others on a wild joy ride of shared diversion when the majority of the kids are engaged in learning, it can be quite frustrating. I gently place my hand on B's shoulder requesting that he turn around, stop talking and sing with the teacher leading the songs. He glares at me as if I am the enemy, folds his arms and decides to sit down on the floor, in the midst of 99 other students who seem to be quite perplexed by B's display.
As all of the kids begin to sing, B. stands up, arms still folded, eyes burning a hole in me as he glares across the room. I smile at him and encourage him to sing along. His friends around him try to cajole him into smiling but he is one stuck little cookie. He does not want to move on, or he is simply not able. For whatever reason, it's wearing on my heart as I truly do not like when a child is unhappy or glaring at me for 20 minutes for that matter.
As we return to the classroom, B. decides to throw his arms around me and melt into a hug. Clearly he is having a difficult time regulating his emotions this morning and my heart goes out to him. I smile and encourage him to focus on a happy thought of something he will do today that he loves. He smiles back and I hope that our day will be on the right track now.
Fast forward 30 minutes to literacy center time. I am in the middle of teaching a reading group and most of the kids know that this is one of our most sacred learning times. Of course, as in any classroom, there are the frequent flyers who take any opportunity to need intervention, usually to stay safe or not cause a major commotion.  As B. comes hurtling across the room with a story to tell, I gently hold up my hand in a "wait" and tell him that he can ask a friend for help before coming to me. B. tries to talk to me and I redirect him back to his desk. He blurts out that the girl next to him has stuck her tongue out at him. I ask him to please tell her to stop and direct them both back to work. Precious minutes have disappeared from my instructional reading group time and I feel myself annoyed again though I try so hard to be patient.
B. returns to his table and instead of sitting in his chair, climbs under the table and looks out, as if he is an animal in the cage. Again he burns a hole in me with his stare; I motion for him to get out and return to my teaching. I have learned to ignore the annoying but not dangerous attention seeking behavior. B cannot get past his feeling upset that this girl has stuck her tongue out. Mind you, she does this to almost every student in class, almost every day, so most of the kids just ignore her.
It's time for a center change and B. has come out of his hiding space. He hasn't done any work yet today, but at least he is not bothering anyone else. I announce his name as one of the students coming to my reading table. He smiles and races over, and I sigh in relief. Ok, things are going to get better now, I hope.
B. struggles along with a group about the same level as he is. He loves stories but mostly listening to them and he gets very excited as he gets to predict during the picture walk. As we begin to read and I listen and help each child B. gets frustrated when he can't read a word. I tell him to try once more and I will help him in 20 seconds after I finish with another student. That's not fast enough for him, so he puts his head down on the table and sulks.
Perhaps you are thinking of a million strategies and interventions I can do with B. Trust me, I have tried many and I talk with his parents often who also worry about his resilience and sensitivity. We are working on helping him to develop strategies to deal with moments when things don't go quite the way he wants them to. After he blurted out at home that he "just wants to die", his mom requests to meet with me and talk about how we can help him. Although she is open to counseling, her husband does not want the stigma of admitting his child is struggling.They have had some parental health issues since B. was born, so it's no surprise that he is having a little trouble coping during his first year of school!
Perhaps you are wondering about the rest of the class as I spend all of this time helping B. Although I used B. as an example, he is definitely not the only child in my class requiring a great deal of energy. I have at least 3 other boys who have a great deal of difficulty managing attention and impulses. One, in particular is the oldest of the lot, having turned 6 in early December, but, as his mom puts it, "He has no filter. He just says whatever he is thinking." Just the other day this boy told me, "Hey, Mrs. Young, do you think you can hurry up teaching us? I'm getting tired."  ( This comment, mind you, happens because as we go through a discussion the impulsive kids interrupt several times, making the explanation of the activity take longer. Still though they have been sitting not even 5 minutes!) Another boy, whose desk most always looks like a tornado has struck, is a virtual tornado himself, often seen spinning himself across the classroom while the rest of the students try to ignore him and do their tasks. This child has great difficulty managing attention for more than about 3 minutes and does anything he can to avoid tasks involving a pencil.  The other boy I mentioned turned 5 just at the cut-off point late November/early December and has no interest in being at school. He comes to the rainbow rug each day with something stashed that he can throw at a peer. He rolls around on the floor or worse, stimulates himself by rubbing on his desk or the floor. He seeks out peer attention and uses his body to communicate instead of his words! Can you say, exhausting?
  I also have an adorable little girl on the Autistic spectrum (referred to as having an Asperger's diagnosis) who has a tendency to do off the wall things for attention. Like what? Like taking the fish tank and trying to carry it across the room, or shouting," Mrs. Young, you are a crazy old fool!" as I try to teach a lesson. These behaviors are nothing compared to the beginning of the year scenarios where she lunged across the room announcing her intent to poke her peers or me in the eye with a pencil. We have worked very diligently to keep her and the others safe this year and she never ceases to amaze me with her lively imagination and creative abilities.
This post only describes the first 2 hours of a day in Kindergarten. After recess we ( my student teacher/intern and I)   help kids calm down and regulate if they have had peer issues on the playground. We try to provide a positive, consistent routine to keep their spirits upbeat and the learning playful.  The kids who benefit most are those who can handle their emotions, get enough rest, and have been taught that life sometimes doesn't serve up exactly what you want, when you want it!
If you have a child about to begin school, think about his/her resilience. A wonderful website with resources for building self-regulation and resilience is Fishfulthinking. If you have other resources to share, please comment below! If any of this sounds familiar to you, please comment as well. All of us together can help kids when we share strategies that work!

What a Test Score Won't Reveal.. the Story of a Learner

I've been thinking a lot lately (oh no! run, she's been thinking again, and that usually leads to a long ramble..run while you still can! ) about how much of learning is about student/teacher relationships and other factors that do not get revealed with a #2 pencil on a multiple choice test.  Yes, pedagogy and teaching strategies are critical when kids are regularly attending school and participating; they allow us to push students to higher levels of thinking and creating. Without positive student-teacher relationships, however, kids may not even be physically and mentally present enough to  learn. As kids get older, do they show up to class or even school if they feel like their teachers don't care or  have respect for them? Maybe, but I doubt that they learn much in class.  Even younger students "check out" and even "act sick" to avoid school when they feel marginalized or misunderstood.
Ok, so all of this is a no-brainer to those of us committed to empowering and inspiring learners each day. What's my point? The point is that we are being held accountable for a complicated and often messy learning journey where we give our blood sweat and tears to help our students, by a number on a test; a test that takes a snapshot of a blurred brief moment will determine whether we are good teachers. And with tales of impending merit pay schemes, I am worried that basing pay on test scores will be yet another impetus for good teachers to flee education. It will also be another reason for cheating and all kinds of issues that take the focus away from what we want: students who are competent to meet the challenges of a complex world.   Although I agree that we can use some help in improving teacher training, both preservice and continued professional development, basing our pay on test scores misses a key point: the impact we make and the learning that takes place in a school year may not make its debut appearance during a stressful session of bubbling in dots on an answer sheet. 

Does a single set of standardized test scores truly tell the story of any kid? Does it tell anything meaningful and productive about the current teacher or even those in the grades prior where testing did not occur?  Does the score reflect the value of what we have done all year?
Does it reveal:

• that Johnny has been homeless and for the first time this year he feels safe only during the day because he trusts his teacher at school?
• that for all of kindergarten and 1st grade, the teachers who had that special needs child who didn't "qualify for any help" spent countless hours on their own researching and learning about how to help her, and even more hours keeping her and the class safe and engaged in learning?
• that Sean's teacher spent hours each day trying to help him focus as his mom was getting chemo all during his days in kindergarten?
• that parents and teachers often come together as partners in kids' education only to be blocked by school policies that necessitate years of failure before kids are deemed "in need" of extra help?
• that in one school year a student made more than two years of growth, even though the test shows that he is still below grade level because he was not feeling well that week?

I could go on and on, but that's where I ask you to chime in share your stories. What does a test score leave out of the story?  How can we raise our united voices as teachers and stop this nonsensical belief that test scores tell the entire story?

When Your Kids are Smarter than You!

This picture is from Nick's apartment at MIT. I just thought it was a great pic as it reveals the complexity of what he is working on and his sweet dedication to Trouble and Gillie, his dogs. Nick surpassed me in smarts a long time ago!

Model a Love for Learning: Try Something New!

Yesterday I decided to take a risk in my classroom. Ok, I can hear you now thinking, "What does she mean, take a risk?" "Don't I have enough to do already?" Don't worry, I also have many things to do and lots of pressure to get my students ready for first grade in these last 7 weeks of school. With all that in mind, I  decided to try something new by experimenting with GarageBand, an application on this Mac laptop so graciously loaned to me by my school district.  In honor of Earth Day this week, I wanted to record my students talking about how they plan to take care of the Earth. It sounded like a good idea, right?  I have only played around at home on Garageband and have never tried recording voices or making any kind of podcast.  On top of that lack of experience, I am always a bit apprehensive about using new technology with my students out of fear something won't work; I am also worried about their short supply of patience. The truth is: when an adult models working hard at learning something new, kids are very helpful and patient!  Not only did I manage to record the kids voices, I also recorded Miss Harrington and I talking about the interviews (during our lunchtime, of course!) I edited for about 3 hours last night (because I am still learning!) and also added the kids responses to a fun site, Wallwisher, where I posted our class wallwisher . On my class website, in the weekly blog I invited parents to chime in on how they will help the Earth by adding a note to the wallwisher. I also posted the recording of the kids answering the question: "What will you do to help the Earth?"
So, after all that rambling, what's the point of this post? In case you missed it, here it is! Kids need to see adults learning new things, experimenting, and taking risks to create something new. If we want to develop kids who are willing to think critically and work hard, then we must model these behaviors ourselves so that we can facilitate a love for learning.
How do you show kids that you are open and committed to learning new things? Please chime in and share!

An End to Spring Break..

It's Sunday night, the last night of spring break and I am trying to stop the emergence of stress, the pressure of anticipating a busy back to school day tomorrow. It's not like I don't love my job or my class. Truly, I do!  It's just that transitions are difficult for all of us, especially 5 year olds; after nine days of not having to get up early and be on a structured routine, they will be groggy and probably restless as they ease back into the routine. As I write I am brainstorming how I will make the transition easier!
First, I will give lots of "talk and share" time tomorrow for kids to catch up with each other and find out what they did over spring break. I gave them "Spring break Journals" to write in before break and I will let them project their stories on the big screen throughout our day tomorrow.
Next, I think I will take any opportunity to be outside with my class. Perhaps I will take my story time outside as I introduce our new Language Arts theme: Spring is Here. It looks like it will be a beautiful day tomorrow so why not go outside and do some hands on observation of what spring looks and feels like! Maybe the birds will give us a nice song as well.  In the afternoon, during math, I am thinking of making a few number lines with sidewalk chalk. I will teach the kids how to use the number line and give them some fun opportunities to learn while practicing addition by jumping across it!
Finally, I will just enjoy "being in the moment" and try to be patient as they adjust to the long school day. I am feeling better already as I remind myself that each school day does not have to be perfect. It's important that kids come to school and experience a safe, stimulating place where they can explore and become excited about their learning!

The Power of Awe, Fascination, and Wonder : Part II

Back in November I wrote a post about The Power of Positive Emotions and Engagement in the classroom. I discussed how I would use a photo each day to inspire awe and wonder in my kindergarten kids, primarily to promote positive emotions in the classroom, which many researchers claim leads to more engaged learning. I also promised to post a picture of the "Inspiration Board, so here it is! ( yes, better late than never!)
I often see kids gazing at this board, conveniently positioned by the sink/drinking fountain, pondering what it would be like to be one of these animals. It's a great positive distraction space when someone is having a tough time letting go of a negative experience on the playground or even a difficult beginning at home that morning.
As a follow-up, I am incorporating this board with the themes we are studying in Language Arts. For example, during our theme "Wheels go Around" I showed kids, via my projector and laptop, pictures of different awe-inspiring vehicles and items with wheels. I did not print these pictures, unfortunately, because I frankly have used tons of ink at home.  In the future, for our upcoming "World of Animals" theme, I plan to announce via my class blog that kids are welcome to bring in inspiring pictures to share via the document camera and then for posting to the board. I also plan to have the students write "speech bubbles" or "captions" for the pictures. It will be fun to see what they write in response to pictures they can choose to respond to.
What strategies do you use to inspire awe, fascination and wonder in the classroom? Do you think it's worth the time spent to consciously create a positive classroom environment? 

Environment is Key: Keeping it Calm and Positive

I have long believed that environment is critical in helping kids become their best selves. As a teacher, it is critical that I provide a safe place where kids can take risks, grow socially, academically and emotionally and become independent learners ready for 1st grade! 
As I write this, I become even more painfully aware that this environment is in jeopardy each day as more and more cuts impact education. In some school districts, including a district where I previously worked, K-3 classes are going to rise to 34 students and upper grades: 38+ students. My school will go to 24 students in primary classes next year.  Now if all kids were coming to school healthy, emotionally regulated and ready and able to learn, perhaps there would be less of a  problem.
There seems to be a trend that kids are coming to school with more intense physical and emotional needs; many display challenging behaviors requiring intense individual intervention. From Autism Spectrum Disorders, such as Asperger's to serious food allergies, to asthma to ADHD, not to mention emotional regulation challenges, the average teacher has at least a few students who meet such criteria.
In my class this year, for example, I have at least 5 students who are identified as having asthma. When the weather changes, or after even something as simple as an upper respiratory infection many of those students are given medications which make them absolutely bounce off the walls. I have several highly emotional students whose "meltdowns", particularly in the afternoons when they are tired, are stress-inducing for other students.
Although I am not allowed to diagnose and even further, dislike "labeling" kids, there are at least three students who meet the diagnostic criteria for ADHD in my class. These students have great difficulty sustaining attention, cannot sit for more than a few minutes, and disrupt those around them who are ready to learn.  Three of those students are also in the asthma group. Coincidence?
In addition to those with issues of inattention and constant activity, several of my students have recent life changes that impact their daily emotional stability. Divorce, new babies at home, parents laid off or returning to work, parental long-term illness and other issues seriously impact kids each day.  We must arm our kids with tools to deal with their emotions so that they can be in a state of relaxed alertness, ready for learning. 
So, what do we do?
First, we must be sure that we give kids strategies to work through emotions. In class today, we discussed what we can do when we are upset, angry or frustrated. The students came up with some ideas: count to 10, breathe deeply, talk to someone, walk around for a few minutes, get a drink of water, and try to not think about it! Not long ago one of my students came up with a helpful strategy for himself; he says that when he gets upset at school he can "walk around it" in his mind and come back to solve that problem later. Of course, what he says isn't necessarily what he does as he can be observed on many occasions when he doesn't get his way yelling, "I guess you just don't love us!" across the classroom. Although these wise 5 year olds can say what they "could do" they surely need practice and adults who regularly model healthy expression of feelings. 
Not only must we model and explicitly teach healthy ways of expressing anger and frustration, we must also be cognizant of the media influence on young minds. Kids often use video games, movies, tv, and even music lyrics as both models and excuses for their behavior and outbursts. How do they learn to use such excuses at the tender age of five?  Parents may not "allow" their five year olds to play violent video games or watch "mature content" shows, but if someone in the home is doing so with the child walking in and out of the room, the exposure is certainly there. 
Providing a calm, emotionally and physically safe environment must be a team effort between parents and school. The experiences in both environments greatly impact the child and his capacity for learning. We must be vigilant to keep kids feeling calm and safe. Only then will we see optimal growth for each child.
How do you keep the environment safe and positive for your kids, at home or at school? Please share so that we can all learn from each other!